Dealing with the Burdens of Life...
~Accept that some days your the pigeon, and some days your the statue.
~Always keep your words soft & sweet, in case you have to eat them.
~Always read stuff that will make you look good in case you die in the middle of it.
~Drive carefully. It's not only cars that can be recalled by their maker.
~If you can't be kind, at least have the decency to be vague.
~If you lend someone $20 and never see that person again, it was probably worth it.
~It may be that your sole purpose in life is to simply serve as a warning to others.
~Never buy a car you can't push.
~Never put both your feet in your mouth at the same time, because then you won't have a leg to stand on.
~Since it's the early bird that gets the worm, sleep late.
~The second mouse gets the cheese.
~When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
~Birthdays are good for you. The more you have, the longer you live.
~You may one be one person in the world, but you may also be the world to one person.
~Some mistakes are too much fun to only make once.
~We could learn a lot from crayons. Some are sharp, some are pretty, and some are dull. Some have weird names and all are different colors, yet they all live together in the same box.
~A truly happy person is one who can enjoy the scenery on a detour.